This Is Hands-Down The Best Drunk Food In New Orleans

If you can get past the name — dump truck fries — you'll appreciate Avenue Pub's concept. They're the I'm-drunk-and-feeling-fancy version of meat-and-cheese-topped fries: a heaping paper boat of fresh cut taters gets topped with lemongrass pulled pork, béchamel sauce, and scallions. 

13 Monaghan, a bar on Frenchmen Street, inflicts a special kind of torture on its late-night customers: making them choose between the menu's five tachos variations. (Tachos = tater tot nachos, for the unfortunate souls who have yet to try them.) Ultimately, you'll want to opt for the Srirachos, which are just spicy enough to give you a necessary late-night jolt for the wee hours. They come laden with chicken, cheddar, jalapeños, cilantro, and Sriracha-laced ranch dressing.

This sandwich at The Camellia Grill may be sloppy — but at 3 a.m., that's probably a pretty good word to describe you, too. It's a double cheeseburger on toasted rye, with just enough DIY components to make you feel like you're still a functioning human. The chefs serve the sandwich with sides of chili and coleslaw that you can put between the slices, eat out of the cups, or pour straight down your gullet. 

If your gumption to eat alligator comes from a few daiquiris, so be it. That's the star meat of this sausage sandwich at Cooter Brown's. It comes topped with other Southern classics including fried green tomatoes, Creole mustard, and buttermilk slaw. Eat it with a side of meat and crawfish hand pies, which the restaurant sources locally from Mrs. Wheat's.

Tipsy you is going to need a phonetic spelling of this one: Diva Dawg's étouffée nachos (eh-two-fay) sound more upscale than they are. They're just NOLA-fied corn chips that get smothered in creamy étouffée sauce and chunks of fried crawfish.

The best things in life may be free, as the song goes, but the second best things in life are cheese. These goat cheese croquettas from Mimi's in the Marigny are an excuse to shove the stuff — and lots of it — into your mouth outside the comforts of your own home. We recommend ordering two servings at a time. (Trust us, three of these addictively delish bites is not enough — especially after a few rounds.)