25 Tips Every Married Couple Needs To Hear

It can be a favorite restaurant or the corner café where you always go for coffee. It can be a local park or far-off vacation spot. The "where" doesn't matter as long as you have someplace memories are made together. 

"Please" and "thank you" shouldn't be something you just teach your kids or say to strangers. If anything, nice manners count all the more when you're married. Say "please" and "thank you" for everything: For making the bed. For passing the butter. For picking up after the dog. Being gracious and grateful for the mundane matters.

When you're falling in love, you probably labor under the delusion that you'll always agree on everything. Not so much. As you learn what topics you'll never agree on, politely agree to disagree. It serves no one to keep beating up the same old themes. 

The tough parts always come. But they also pass. 

In our casual society, it's acceptable to wear jeans and sweatpants almost anywhere. But it's also nice to put on your fancy clothes once in a while to show you made the extra effort (like you did when you were dating, right?!). 

It reinforces your own bond.  

Which is over and over and over. Living with someone is messy, and we're all imperfect. Get over your pride, and know when to let it go. Perpetual pouting and grudge-holding don't build up a marriage. 

Opposites may attract, but it can be tricky to manage opposing beliefs in the long run. Similar views on the world, faith, and life in general are what keep you both working toward common needs and goals. 

Sunday afternoon walks. Exchanging Valentines. Watching a favorite holiday movie together. Shared rituals keep you close and highlight what's unique about you as a couple. 

A lipstick kiss on the mirror. A scrap of paper tucked in the other person's bag. A scribble on the edge of the grocery list. Your notes can be naughty or nice, but it's sweet to find a note that says "I love you" where you least expect it. 

Aretha got it right. Talking down to the other person, belittling them, and mean-spirited teasing aren't what makes a marriage work in the long run. 

 Whether it's acknowledging your first date or your twentieth anniversary, make an effort. A card, a dinner out, a breakfast date—whatever you can do to honor the day the two of you became a couple. 

Your wedding photo does not count. Print it, frame it, and display it. 

Don't let being in a hurry steal these tokens of your affection. Greet each other every single time you leave the house; you never know what can happen when you're apart. Then rejoice in the reunion when the other one comes home. 

Let your spouse hear you say something good about him or her to someone else. It's sort of a thrill to hear yourself bragged on, and who doesn't need an occasional pat on the back?

My gram always said it's better to laugh than to cry. If you can look at the ridiculousness of the moment instead of freaking out every time something goes awry (whether it's lost luggage, flooded basements, or clogged sinks!), you'll be a lot less likely to give up on each other. 

Know when to take a break and visit with friends or nurture your own interests. Because, yeah, sometimes we all do get on each other's nerves. Absence can make the heart grow fonder and reset the ticker on your patience.  

It's not the most uplifting experience to try to talk to you partner when he's surfing the web or texting. Establish a tech-free zone (or time) when you interact with each other and do real things in the real world: Go watch a sunset. Listen to the birds sing. Take a walk. Do anything together but stare at your phones. 

Not all the time. But occasionally let the other person choose an activity or movie, even if it's one you don't particularly enjoy.