9 Alternative Wedding Cake Ideas For People Who Hate Cake
No one wants to watch you feed each other anyway.
If you've ever watched someone plan a wedding on a reality show, you've probably heard them say some variation of the following sentence: "I just really want our special day to feel unique!" Traditional might as well be a four-letter word. It's this kind of sentiment that has brides choosing colorful dresses that offend their grandmothers and bucking any dessert that involves icing. We're not about pissing off sweet, sweet Nana, but we're all for an unconventional after-dinner treat. Check out eight of our favorite ideas.
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Cinnamon Rolls
With the brunch trend taking over the wedding circuit, couples are opting out of traditional cakes in favor of something a little more breakfast-oriented. A Washington-based couple, Samantha King and Gabe Porter, went with classic, peanut butter, and raspberry-filled cinnamon roll tiers to celebrate their big day.
Pizza
What your guests really need after a night full of dancing, rather than sugar, is sustenance. Pizza packs a protein punch (hello, pepperoni and glorious cheese!) and has enough carbs to sop up the tequila shot your drunk uncle just forced upon you.
Cereal and Milk
If it's good enough for Margot Robbie, it's good enough for us. After dinner, the actress set up a self-serve table of Cocoa Puffs and milk, but you could up the fun factor by offering a whole array of cereals and mix-ins, like chocolate chips, sprinkles, and whipped cream.
Ranch Dressing
It's white, and it's tiered. Squint hard enough, and you might actually think a ranch fountain is cake. It's the post-dinner treat your guests deserve, and you can please just about anyone by keeping your dipper game strong: carrots for your MOH who's doing Whole30, chicken wings for the overgrown frat bro your fiancé insisted on inviting, and pizza for whatever rugrats have managed to keep their eyes open this late.
Donuts
If donut makers are going to deprive us of valuable fried dough by leaving a hole in the middle of their pastries, you might as well put the design flaw to good use. Enter: Donut walls. They're super simple to create — you just need a peg board and some dowels — and make the best photo backdrop.
Cotton Candy
Serving this ball game staple at your wedding is not the definition of classy, but fondant just doesn't taste as good. Plus, anyone who doesn't love cotton candy (or at least the idea of it) is a monster.
Waffles
There is not a world in which your friends and family want to watch you frost your own cake. They will, however, sit patiently while you drizzle syrup all over a tower of waffles. Bonus points if you wait until the wee hours of the morning to serve the breakfast food.
Cheese
You know what looks a lot like cake? Cheese rounds — stacks on stacks of cheese rounds. The whole cheese-as-dessert thing is super European too, so it's good prep for that Paris honeymoon you're heading to in the morning.
Burgers
When you serve a massive tower of burgers post-dinner, no one will remember how dry the chicken they ate for their main course was. And just look at this groom's smile. Is that not how every man should entire the sacred institution of marriage?
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