I Tried All Of The Lunchables Combos And Ranked Them From Worst To Best

This one sounded the most promising until you realize the pepperoni is half the thickness of the pepperoni used in the pizza package! An absolute outrage. Because the pepperoni is so thin and the mozzarella is so subtle, you're just getting a big ol' bite of cracker.

I would very much like Millennials to be removed from this Brunchable narrative. We did not ask for this! The flatbread was very difficult to slice in half and ended up crumbling apart and there were three small pieces of bacon for two sandwiches...which...doesn't even make sense in the Lunchable world. The only thing I loved about this combo was the blueberry muffin: It was sweet, moist, and had a decent amount of blueberries.

The dough to sauce to cheese ratio is all over the place on this one. No matter what you do, you're getting more chewy dough than any other flavor because, unfortunately, the two cheeses don't have any flavor whatsoever.

Not only does the cheese have no flavor but the ham isn't salty enough to combat the thick cracker. Also...the cookie was soggy yet stale because it's refrigerated. P.S. Please note this was the Lunchable that convinced me I needed to drink a full glass of red wine to combat this monstrosity.

Fun fact: This was the Lunchable that started it all! Kraft-Heinz created these to get Americans to eat more bologna by marketing them to kids with fun shapes. This one gets the same rating as the ham and American cracker combo; the meat isn't salty enough to make up for that stale cookie that it comes with.

Y'all, the cheddar really doesn't add much. I gave it an extra 0.1 points even though I'm pretty sure it's a placebo effect.

How does the turkey and American combo get such a better ranking than the ham and American? I'll tell you: The turkey is far more salty (essential), and you get two Double Stuf Oreos! The cheese is still barely noticeable, so it doesn't make it any higher on the list.

The turkey simply has a saltier, better flavor than the ham. It's a marginal difference between the American and cheddar cheese flavor, you just have to tell yourself they're different.

These would be far better microwaved, but that's beside the point. Putting chicken nuggets in the same ranking as cheese and crackers is really unfair TBH, because chicken nuggets will always win. However, there is no assembly or creativity involved when you're eating this Lunchable which is a crucial part of the experience.

This already gets a plus one for including a KitKat. I remember seriously disliking this combo as a kid, but it's actually...really...delightful? The nacho cheese and salsa together is the right amount of spicy meets savory-sweet. I would like to apologize for the years of slander I committed against this combo in my previous life.

The only negative here is that it comes with the fruit punch flavored Capri Sun. The pepperoni perfectly covers the pizza so it's not too much dough to the face. It's incredible in the world of Lunchables—but it obviously does not compare to a NYC slice of pizza. Don't get it twisted.