Appetizers are a gift from above to a bunch of tipsy New Years Eve partiers, but not all are created equal. Here are the six you should avoid if you want to start 2020 off on a good foot. (Pssst: Here are a bunch of apps that don't suck.)
Broccoli Crudité
The veggie has a rep for being disliked—and that's when it's roasted or smothered with cheese. So to serve it raw is an ignorant act not even a keg of ranch or a vat of creamy dip could fix. And do you really want tiny green pieces stuck in all your guests' teeth for the whole night?
Turkey Pinwheels
The kind made with puff pastry and cheese—lots and lots of melted cheese—get a pass. The mushy roll-ups that come from the supermarket, however, should be banned. (Minus even more points if you serve them on that janky black plastic tray they come on.) They're usually too heavy on the mayo and too light on anything worth eating. Not to mention the tortilla wraps are always suspiciously damp.
Shrimp Cocktail
Go ahead and blame this trend on the boomers: For a reason unbeknownst to the current generation, our grandparents and parents propagated this party app, serving it at every important gathering. But the word 'cocktail' isn't fooling anyone: You've simply hung cold, slimy, limp shrimp off the edge of a cup that's meant for alcohol—but instead is filled with a mix of ketchup and horseradish.
Soup Shooter
No buzzed party-goer has ever said, "You know what I'm craving? A couple sips of soup." Tiny shot glasses of liquid veggies seem adorable in theory, but in actuality, they're just a waste of vessels that could be filled with booze.
Mixed Nuts
Ringing in the new year wrist-deep in a pool of everyone else's germs sounds like the opposite of glamorous. Nuts are a little too easy to scarf mid-awkward small talk (and choke on, providing the uncomfortable exclamation point to your riveting discussion about the weather). Plus, filling up on them—especially when there are slices of prosciutto and mini meatballs to devour—is just sad.
Bacon-Wrapped Dates
There are combos that work together seamlessly, like peanut butter and jelly or macaroni and cheese, and then there are foods that have been forced to marry. Dates and bacon are one such example. Dates should only be consumed when snuck into secretly-healthy desserts, if at all. Don't waste precious bacon on them.
Cheese Balls
It's not that cheese is bad—far from it. It's just that you're better off putting out a cheese board, with different types that people can cut themselves, than one massive lump of mixed together cheese that everyone's digging in to all night.
