Despite the fact that I moved to NYC under the impression New Yorkers were blunt, rude, and would not only reject my neighborly sidewalk wave but push me into a pile of garbage and rats for even attempting the obligatory hello, I've found the culture here to be the complete opposite of how certain movies have portrayed it. There's a real "the more the merrier" mentality going on.
In my experience, it was easy to meet new people and expand my social circle once I landed. After all, it is a city crawling with transplants (like myself!) who are just looking for a new rec league friend or Bumble BFF match. Admittedly, though, after seven years in the city, I can't say that I'm still all that good at meeting new people and expanding my social circle. I suppose I've settled into my comfort zone.
So, when I stumbled across Timeleft, a unique app that pairs you with like-minded strangers for Wednesday evening dinner plans, I was immediately intrigued—and ready to channel the social butterfly energy I once possessed at 23. If anything, it was an excuse to take myself out to dinner and skip a night of cooking—leaving with new friends would just be an added bonus.
The concept was simple. I signed up, paid $20, and filled out a questionnaire with easy Q's: Did I consider myself funny or smart? Was I guided by logic or emotion? That sorta thing.
A few days before the dinner, my app released info on the reservation (i.e., where we'd be going and at what time) and let me know that the icebreaker game would unlock at 7 p.m., when we all arrived. While you're not able to chat with the other attendees ahead of time, there is a convenient feature in the app for the chronically late (guilty as charged) that even lets your fellow diners know if you're running a few minutes behind. It came in handy.
I arrived at the restaurant (a sorta subpar midtown Mexican joint) five minutes after 7 and informed the host that I was attending a Timeleft dinner. She promptly escorted me to the table, where I was greeted by three friendly strangers.
I sat down, ordered an Aperol Spritz, and started chatting up my dinner mates—all of whom had different stories and jobs, but who were relatively recent transplants. One had lived in New York City for less than seven months and was an avid user of the app (he'd been to at least 10 dinners), while the second arrived in Brooklyn just two weeks prior from Canada. The third guest, the only other girl, had been in NYC a little bit longer (two years) and was a busy cardiac surgery resident looking for connections outside of the hospital.
While the food was truly mid (minus the chips and guac) (you really can't mess that up), the conversation flowed. We chatted about our careers and upbringings, our time in New York, books, and travels. In fact, we never felt the need to use the icebreaker game at all. The fact that we were all there just to get to know each other made it easy. There was no awkward mingling through a mixer crowd or the pressure to think up endless conversations for the person across from you. The group dynamic took that pressure off, and there was never a silent moment. The conversation slowly segmented off into separate conversations, but would always rejoin.
I went in with the expectation that we would all be super similar, and while we definitely shared interests, we weren't just carbon copies of each other—which made the experience so much more interesting. Going through the process to fill out the questions, agree to the reservation, and actually show up requires a lot of intentionality, so it only makes sense everyone was that friendly and just happy to be there.
One hour turned into two and then three. Though a post-dinner bar reservation unlocks in the app at 8 o'clock for those that want to keep the night going, we opted to stay at the same restaurant for coffee and dessert instead. We still wanted to chat, but without the threat of a Thursday morning hangover.
After 10:30, I said my goodbyes to the surgery resident and strolled along with the two others towards the subway—they had clearly hit it off and were exchanging numbers for a weekend hangout. I smiled. While I hadn't necessarily met a new best friend myself, it was a perfectly lovely evening. It was refreshing to chat with people outside my usual circle and even get to watch a budding new friendship form before my eyes. Plus, you know, we got churros. I wonder who I'll meet next.
